As I got older, the descriptive adjectives I heard from others regarding those who watch cartoons were “lazy, unmotivated, immature, childish”. When I internally processed those labels, it felt very negative and shameful- and I knew that I didn’t want to be labeled or percieved within categories that people were constantly looking down upon. I stopped watching cartoons and followed the crowd in order to not be defined in negative terms from the people around me despite learning a lot and being inspired by the cartoons and shows I was watching. Anyways, back to the important shit. Work, money, the pursuit of happiness…. Well I went to college. There I was told to pick a degree- I felt the immense pressure of having to decide my fate at that pivotal moment. At that point in my life, being an artist or anything in the creative realm would have been “foolish, a gamble, a hobby, a silly dream”. That didn’t matter anyway since the creativity within me seemed to slowly diminish and become non-existent around the 6th grade as there was always school or sports to focus on. Being so, there was not even an ounce of thought in my world that I was a painter, artist and creator in my mind at the time. I chose something that I knew would be extremely difficult, but very highly regarded in society, notable: Pre Law. There was another part of me that loved writing. So I also decided to major in English. Though a year late and through mental battles and extreme tests of what I could endure, I graduated college in 2018. Hoping I had made the right decisions to set myself up for success and in turn a happy life, I sought out into the world, bright eyed and bushy tailed for a future filled with endless possibilities and hope. My professional resume by the time I was 28 was incredible by society’s terms. Having been an HR Manager for a nonprofit, opening two new facilities and staffing each, helping the world become a better place. Becoming the Talent Manager for one of the worlds most renowned real estate agents with an office in Beverly Hills, ME: a small town girl from Harlingen, Texas. 

Despite this I felt unfulfilled, and didn’t feel like I thought I would feel having attained material and social status. I still didn’t feel “successful” in my own reality. I wasn’t truly happy, but I should’ve been because I was taught my whole life that a good career and hard work would make me happy and create a good life for me. I was battling with myself, wondering where I’d gone wrong in the decisions I made. I set myself up for the happiest life possible and worked hard for it. Yet here I was in Beverly Hills amongst the stars still feeling a little empty and incomplete inside. I decided I was going to find out what my passion and purpose was. I tried everything- making rugs, starting a clothing line, creating music, which I found to be really fun, but still not entirely fulfilling. Still I continued to try new things to discover what really made me feel successful and happy, though I still had to work full time to pay my bills and survive, so with the spare time I did have- I decided to continue exploring the repressed parts of myself, paving and dedicating time for play and adventure. Calling back to the child I once was that had hopes + dreams: a girl who saw beauty/joy in the world around her and loved to create. A human inspired by cartoons. Go watch the video below to see how painting became my creative outlet and passion cause I know you’re tired of reading. :-)